So, years ago, I devoted my entire existence to sexual conquest. The whole time I kept asking him if he really - BUT LIKE REALLY, REALLY - had ever considered going into porn. Finally that time things worked and it was great. So when he put it on, I had no better idea than to yell, 'OMG IT LOOKS LIKE A FIRE EXTINGUISHER.' The borrowed condom turned out to be red. He didn't have condoms so, as he told me later, he asked his friend for one as we were exiting the party. After a party where we both drank way too much, we ran to his place. I remember thinking of that SATC episode where Samantha really tries to make it work but the guy is just too big. It was as if it were my first time all over again. Some days later we tried again - he did get it up, but when he went to put it in, it was just…impossible. Didn't think much of it or notice the size. Great, fantastic.Īfter some weeks of keeping it PG-13, we went to his house.aaaaand he couldn't get it up. Things went slow for a while because we had so many friends in common, we wanted to make sure it would work out before jumping into a relationship and then having to call it off. I started seeing this guy after breaking off a five-year-long relationship.
